Brazil's Worst TV

While I'm on a blog writing role, and since TV is such an inspiring topic, I'm going to give you a review of Brazil's worst TV (and don't worry, there was plenty of bad TV to pick from!). My suggestion, if moving to Brazil, invest in Sky Gato (Brazil's hijacked version of cable) so you can watch Friends with Portuguese subtitles to your heart's content...

I guess I'll just start off with the worst and get the shock over with. Maybe it's a Brazilian thing, but foreigners will NEVER be able to ajust to Panico... Maybe we just get kind of uncomfortable with the 10 second butt close ups. Or maybe we're just too mature for poop fights. Or maybe we no longer have the sense of humor of a five year old and like to see people hitting each other, making fun of each other, making fun of other people, and eating whatever they can blend together. But to a lot of the Brazilian's that I met, puke is fun! So, after that flattering introduction, I hope it can stand up to the expectations!Give it up for your favorite, 12 year old boy humor style show, PANICO!



I hope you're all as disturbed as the rest of Brazil was when we saw that... But if that wasn't enough, how bought a little beach action with Antonio Nunes?



So yeah... Panico is just... bad.


My next show on Brazil's Worst, will have to be ... our very own... Woody Woodpecker! Otherwise known as the national hero, Pica Pau! It's not really any worse in Portuguese than in English, but it's still... Pica Pau...




Next up is " Vai da Namoro! " The thing about this show, is that I rather enjoy watching it, but even I can admit that it's just a very, very stupid show. It's a dating show that's inherently pretty simple. Pair them up, make them kiss, with little intervals of the presenter dancing in women's clothes.


Then, when you pass the five good channels, you will enter the territory of the truly wretched. This includes, almost exclusively, religious TV, and "rural tv." And I have an example of the latter right here: The "Virtual Auctions" show almost 24/7 and are a great chance to get a view of the local livestock! They can be yours, with just one call! And it is essentially this for ... all the time.



And how about some of that religious tv for ya'? Basic Idea: (Ex): Man is chronically ill, preacher preaches for him, he is cured. Hint on how hokey this is? Not even the Brazilian's believe any of it.



Okay, I think with that I'll leave you for the night, but now without letting you see my personal least favorite, often shown on any give 5/30 of the "working channels" during any given moment:



But don't worry! It's not all THIS bad!